Posts Tagged ‘philosophy’

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Letting things fall into place

May 3, 2014

A few weeks ago, Chris Gammell tweeted a link about Buckminster Fuller’s ego-cide. The short version (and bent to reflect my point here): Bucky determined his ego got in the way, that pride and fear were holding him back. He decided to do as he thought was good and let the universe take care of money.

I enjoyed the article. I thought about it for awhile. I started to wonder if I spent so much time pondering it because it is a neat idea from a guy I respect for his varied contributions to many fields. Fuller has such wonderful breadth, our society values depth when synthesis across fields can be just as interesting. In the end, worrying at it like a splinter, the idea of skirting the edge of bankruptcy to follow his wont, I realized that it reminded me of the movie Field of Dreams.

I’ve always thought Field of Dreams was kind of a dumb movie. I have seen it more than a few times as it was the favorite of my best friend in high school (a person who hasn’t spoken to me since the day we graduated).

In particular, the “if you build it, they will come” part annoys me. I’m a planner. Figure out what you want, figure out how to get from here to there, start plodding, ticking off boxes as you go. Monetization is not critical unless you are planning to feed yourself (and family) from this venture.

So ripping out crops to build a baseball diamond because the ghosts tell you to? Kerrrrazy. Absolutely bonkers. Point for style in execution but negative a billion for not having a plan.

That said, my life is in a strange spot. I’ve got some paying work from past clients but it is not a full plate (and always almost finished except they keep adding things). I did all that work for my IoT talk for EELive. I’ve been putting it in blog format, and perhaps managed to sell that as a blog series. It would be neat. And I’m working on the ayok widget which I want to give to a big site (though that one isn’t for sale, it is for personal reasons). But once I do that one, someone might pay me to do more. Building neat things then writing explanations is fun. It is not lucrative, but fun.

Other than my normal “OMG, what if I can never get a job again?” fear that always grates, I’m not overly worried about income. A lot of that is because Christopher makes enough to keep us in kibble. I am looking for a neat opportunity, taking my time about it. Taking a small sabbatical is ok, especially as I’m learning a lot and trying new things.

But if I do stuff because I want to, then someone comes along to say, “hey, that’s neat, let me pay you”,  I’m doing what the movie told me to. And I think that is wrong. Because it always has been.

 

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Why I podcast

September 13, 2013

A couple times, after we stop recording, people have asked why I have a podcast. I need a better answer than I currently have. This is all going to be stream-of-conscious as I sort out the reason and come up with an answer.

The podcast started as a way to learn something new. I was going to do a half dozen shows so I could understand how recording worked. It was a replacement for my normal community-center classes on stained glass, soldering, clay, hula hooping, laser cutting, woodshop, bookbinding, etc.

We’re way beyond six shows and I’m starting to make plans for people three months out: I’m going to be doing this for awhile. I need a better answer to the why question.

Let’s see… It isn’t “to give back”, I hear that reason from other people but I don’t feel that motivation myself.  “To share my passion with other people” is closer. I really like engineering and building things. I want other people to come and play in this lovely sandbox.

I suppose that dovetails into my other reason, “I like people to share their passion with me”. Wow, that kinda came out wrong. And now that I’ve seen that, I look back to the other and snicker. Oh, go ahead and snicker, might as well laugh with me instead of making me go it alone.

Do you ever have those moments when everything is snicker worthy?

Back to topic!

Ehn, let’s circle around and see if I can put this another way.

I like Sports Night, the TV sitcom about running a sports TV show. It is smart and funny. But what I liked best is that the people on the show loved their jobs. Their jobs were annoying, sometimes dumb, sometimes hard. They were jobs. But the characters loved doing them. A common thread with my TV habits is that I like watching happy people do neat things.

Do you see where I’m headed?

I like doing the show because people share their passion, enthusiasm, amusement, happiness, spark of ingenuity, whatever-it-is, with me. I think this is a solid reason and accounts for about half of “why”.

I’m a little shy so I need a way to engage with people, especially in this way. I need the cover of the show to be able to go up to the head of content at EETimes and say “talk to me?”. Or to have a serious (semi-serious) talk about going to Mars with a woman I’ve never met. Or to have a good friend talk about his views on engineering without it seeming like makework.

There is another, subtler reason. I’m a proponent of women in technology (and science). I’ve heard from many sources that a lack of role models causes women to give up too easily. And I’ve seen how never having met a female engineer has warped some folks sense of the possible. I make sure to get a big cast of female engineers on my show. If we’ve have two males guests in a row, I start mining my women-in-tech contacts to make sure the trend doesn’t continue. It hasn’t been that difficult. Really.

To sum up, why I do a podcast, in order of importance:

  • To talk to people who love their jobs
  • To share my passion for engineering
  • To promote the visibility of women in engineering

Huh, ok. Those are good reasons. I don’t need to introspect any deeper. Oh, and in case our accountant reads my blog:

 

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Constructive destruction

September 3, 2012

I was reading a sci-fi novel and got an earworm-like thought. Are humans wired for destruction? Is the drive to break things written somewhere in our genome?

Maybe it is just the folks I hang out with, but we like blowing things up. Fire is fun.  Turning the voltage up to well beyond the specified range is a completely amusing way to spend the time between 4pm and beer on a Friday afternoon. Taking apart things is neat, you get to see how it works. And odd torx-like screws are just double-dog dare.

For the most part (and for most of my life), I’ve been fairly gentle about it. I don’t destroy things that I don’t own. But that isn’t true for everyone and as much as I disagree with the ethics of wanton destruction, I kind of understand it.

Hulk, SMASH!

I understand that, too. And given how popular that character is, despite the crummy movies, well, I’m not the only one.

Why is that? Are we wired for violence? Or destruction? Or both? And if we are, how can we possibly have built this civilization?

***

I was at a job I didn’t like when the office manager came around and asked the engineers if they couldn’t please break down the boxes in shipping and receiving. (It was a small company and the office manager was in a sling at the time, it was an unusual request but not unreasonable.)

Even though I was fairly busy, I went to make the boxes less boxy. It was an odd company, one where I felt very left out of the culture. I wanted to like the people but I didn’t feel like I belonged at all. It wasn’t a very good job for me (though the technology was amusing). It was like a shirt that is too tight in some parts, too loose in others, and seamed with itchy tags.

Anyway, one of the few moment of synchronicity there was as I returned from my deboxing, happier and somewhat refreshed. Another engineer (J) asked about my clearly more relaxed state. I explained that breaking down the boxes is a form of constructive destruction and very meditative for me.

As another person came (A) into the office, he heard and popped into my cubical, saying he loved constructive destruction and asking if there were any more boxes. J looked confused. But for the first time, I felt like A and I could be friends.

***

The ocean is a primal force, shaping the land, uncaring of the destruction it causes. It is what it is. I love the raw, wild feeling as I watch waves crashing on the shore. I know the destructive potential and I like it. Lakes don’t do it for me, bays subdue it too much. I need the awesome power even as it makes me more aware of my own mortality. Or as it tumbles me and shoots seawater though my sinus cavities.

 

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